Just some QUANTITATIVE REASONING

303/1428 climb
539/1428 school
326/1428 work
466/1428 study
29/1428 competition
410/1428 friend
145/1428 sigh
42/1428 yay
234/1428 happy
187/1428 sad
119/1428 lazy
578/1428 feel
283/1428 miss

Out of 1428 posts, these are the words I've used in my blog posts.
It's really quite an interesting comparison when I find out the numbers.
School took the most percentage of my blog posts.
Climbing is generally lower than school stuffs.
But it's still quite a high percentage (21.2%)
Friend takes up a big percentage too (28.7%)
Happy is more than sad.
Lazy is surprisingly less than 10% LOL.
The word feel is used in 40.4% of my blog posts.
Nice, I'm a feeling person.
I think it's of course that feeling is higher than the rest.
I won't blog if I don't feel anything.

Oh well, the interesting part of today's post is over.
Time to hear my rants.
Don't know why you all so interested in reading my rants.
CHEH.
Hahahaha.
Alright.
So I was feeling a little down after climbing today.
Not because of climbing but generally stressing over school work.
I'm really not keeping up with the pace.
The snowball is starting.
Feels like JC all over again.
But well, I was comparing this feeling with when I was in Brunei during OCS.

So let's recall what happened during JCC.
A 9 days course of non-stop trekking with 2 days of food supply.
In the harshest environment that I've ever been.
Rainy days 7 out of 9.
Sleeping in the darkest place with the most weirdest insect you can think of.
Fighting the cold and the wet at night.
And also fighting the cold and the wet in the morning.
Fighting the fatique and all negative thoughts from your mind.
Fighting the worst hunger.
Fighting the thirst.
Fighting the hottest sun in the afternoon.
Loneliness during forager.
Carrying signal set for 9 days straight.
The load crushing on your body.
The uncomfortable feeling wearing your iLBV.
In-grown toe nails.
And through all this misery (which I haven't fully written out),
I made it out alive with a JCC badge and a body that lost more than 5kg.

And I thought about all this just now.
Those were much more worst feelings that I'm feeling now.
Yet I'm complaining.
I remember the night when it rained during Forager.
I cried.
I wanted all this to end.
I wanted to get out of this shit hole.
I wanted to eat.
I missed my family.
I missed all the basic necessities that I took for granted.
I wanted a nice shelter above my head.
I needed warmth.
I wanted to sleep but the rain and cold was keeping me awake.
It was one of the most miserable night I had.
But I remembered the next morning.
It was the most motivating morning I can ever remember.
I sat on my A-frame and stoned for 1 hour.
Recharging all the positive thoughts.
And it all began when I took out a pen and my notebook.
And started writing.
I started planning.
Planning how I was going to ration my food
I could roughly remember.
01 x lor mee
01 x soya milk with barley dessert
02 x mentos
02 x 5 pcs biscuit
01 x fruit bar
01 x quail
01 x potato
01 x maggi pack
That was almost it.
I had all this left for 2 more days and 2 more nights.
I opened up one of the mentos for that day's breakfast and I remember being so motivated all over again.
I've already been through so far (7 days) what's another 2 more days to me?
I knew I could survive.
I knew I was motivated.
I knew that all this is going to end.
And I was going to get proper food in just 2 days time.
All this positivity came and I felt like I was revived.
I was tired, but my mind told me I wasn't.
And that's how I made it out through Cynthia gate on the 9th day.
Knowing that everything is just in the mind.

Today was really not a very good day for me.
I mean climbing was a really good getaway for me.
But when climbing ended, all the stress came rushing back.
And I was so down again.
And now, I'm not going to let the thoughts pull me down.
It's time to take out my pen and notebook and start pushing.
It's not too late.
I know I can definitely do it.
Because I've been through worst.

*inserts bicep emoticon*

#motivated
#owninstudies

Hope you enjoyed this post.
Because I enjoyed it.
Brought back so many thoughts from NS.
Hahahaha.
Byeeeeeeeeee.