Anger management

I can't believe that people around here get so angsty at times. I'll definitely remember and uphold the quote "If you have nothing good to say just shut up." It makes so much sense to just shut up when everyone is angsty already. If you say anymore things, it will just add on to it. Then at the end of the day everyone just becomes unhappy. I still need to learn to think before I talk. I'm quite a fucked up person actually. Blew up twice today. Sigh. Must learn the art of peace. I miss doing meditation during the climbing days. CLIMB ON SAT. Still looking forward to it so far. Hopefully my body is not that tired to prevent me from leaving the house and going to climb. Hahahaha. See ya people soon!

Sunday night

Woohoo, blogging in camp. Sunday really sucks. My mood is always damn bad on Sundays. Cause it's the day where I compare my platoon mates to my civilian mates AKA friends. It's always damn sad to book in you know, makes me feel that the world outside is so great. But whenever I'm outside I always don't cherish the time properly as compared to what I'd have whenever I'm in camp. Was feeling stony and miserable when I'm in my dad's car. Then suddenly 93.3FM played the song na xie nian. I was reading into the lyrics for no reasons. Like normally when you listen to a music you just listen to the beat, but this time, I listened to the lyrics. And all of a sudden, all the flashback memories from secondary school hit back. Felt so strange. Like I've been brought back to the past. And all of a sudden, I started missing you. I feel like talking to you, feel like sharing about my life. Feel like sending you home, feel like sitting below your house chilling. And that army reality snapped back when I reach SAFTI. Feels so sad. A Sunday night to remember.

SUNDAY BLUES

This Sunday blue is killing me. I think I need to plan my weekend more properly. If not it will always just end up wasting my time away.

Anyway I was doing pull ups just now. And guess what. I did 12 and I'm tired as fuck. LOL. It sucks man to feel weak. Can't even do more than 15 pull ups now. I'm becoming less and less like an athlete. More like a fat ass now. I don't want this to happen but yet my body's laziness is taking over me.

I need to go back to climb man. Lose some fats and gain some motivation to climb. I really miss climbing but I'm really damn lazy to go and climb. It's like I rather go out with my friends and eat instead of go and do some routes. OKAY. NEXT WEEK ONWARDS, I'M GOING TO CLIMB. I PROMISE. See me back in the gym on saturday. Or maybe every saturday.

Maybe this motivation will last long. CLIMB CLIMB CLIMB! Suddenly miss the feeling of topping a route. Hope I'll really go back to climb. Hahahaha. Next saturday it shall be. WAIT FOR ME ONSIGHT.

SENIOR BAR LO

Officially a senior in OCS.

Pro term's gonna start next week.

Brunei is coming in less than 30 days.

How fast.

So damn scary hahahaha.

But kinda excited to know how shag it is gonna be.

I really want to know what is my limit.

I almost found mine in scorpion king hahaha.

But no, I'm still helping out and still surviving in scorpion king.

Actually this week has been quite an interesting week.

So many things happening in just 5 days.

ICCT SOC

Then after that sleep sleep sleep.

Then wake up talk cock here and there.

Go into other people's room and stalk people.

Me and George was stalking this girl on her blog.

Then the way she blog is so professional.

Maybe it's just cause she doesn't leave blanks after every sentences.

AND THEN 24km.

Then bam, all the arti cadets are gone.

New Sierra cadets are here.

Felt so damn weird.

Like Platoon 2 isn't Platoon 2 anymore.

Lucky there are still funny people around.

Don't know how I'm gonna survive if they aren't here anymore.

Okay so from this line onwards, I'm going to blog like a professional cb. No more SPACING.

Let's test it out.

Anyway, what I heard from my commanders about pro term is making me look forward to it. It's going to be 22 weeks of tough times but it's going to be a fast one. 4 more weeks and I'm flying off already. Then when I'm back, it's going to already be week 22/38 completed. Block leave, holidays and all the stuffs like that add up together, I'm going to commission real soon! 

Commissioning aside, what I'm actually looking forward to is how my character will change when I stand on the parade square in SAFTI MI. How am I a better person in 20+ weeks time? I'm really pretty excited to find out this myself. Cliche as it may sound, the 2 years in NS can be a waste of time and yet it can also be an enriching 2 years. It all boils down to the mentality of treating NS. If you hate it, this 2 years gonna suck real bad. If you put your heart into it, wanting to learn something, you'll definitely learn something and become a better person. 

Army teaches us life lessons that are difficult to learn in civilian life. That's something I really respect the army for. I'm glad that OCS is changing me over time. Day by day, weeks by weeks, exercise after exercises. Everyday is a learning experience if you are interested to learn. This topic reminds me of when I went out with my old friends the other day, and they told me this "Army really changes people sia. Now when he talk got the Army aura. Very different from people who never go Army." And I'm like wow, really? I guess the changes that I'm talking about is hard for me to notice it myself. The only way for me to judge whether I have improved as a person is through other people's critic. The things people talk about you, reflects on how you have changed as a person. That's what I think.

And with that, I cut off my professional cb and i'm back to normal.

Time to dota.

WQOHOHWEOHOOHOWOOHOO

mai ruk .. jum dai

เลิกกันแล้วไม่จำเป็นต้องพูดหรอก
Lerk gun laeo mai jum pen dtaut poot rauk
We’ve broken up, there’s no need to say anything
เธอไม่ต้องบอกว่าแคร์เค้าเท่าไร
Tur mai dtaung bauk wah care kao tao rai
You don’t have to tell me how much you care about her
ไม่ควรโทรก็พอรู้และเข้าใจ
Mai kuan toh gor por roo lae kao jai
You shouldn’t call, I’ve just realized and understand
แต่จะทำไงมันคิดถึงเธอเหลือเกิน
Dtae ja tum ngai mun kit teung tur leua gern
But what should I do? I miss you so much

(*) ไม่ตั้งใจรบกวน ไม่ตั้งใจวุ่นวาย
Mai dtung jai rop guan mai dtung jai woon wai
I didn’t mean to bother you, I didn’t mean to get mixed up
ไม่ได้ลืมหรอก คำที่เธอบอก
Mai dai leum rauk kum tee tur bauk
I haven’t forgotten the words you said
แต่มันเหงาทนไม่ไหว
Dtae mun ngao ton mai wai
But I can’t stand the loneliness

(**) ไม่รัก…จำได้ แต่ให้ลืมเธอฉันทำไม่ไหว
Mai ruk…jum dai dtae hai leum tur chun tum mai wai
You don’t love me, I remember, but I can’t forget you
ยังคงคิดถึงทุกลมหายใจ
Yung kong kit teung took lom hai jai
I still miss every breath
อย่าเพิ่งรำคาญ อย่ามองว่าฉันดูไม่ดี
Yah perng rum kahn yah maung wah chun doo mai dee
Don’t just get angry, don’t look at me like I’m bad

(***) ไม่รัก…จำได้ เธอไม่จำเป็นต้องย้ำอีกที
Mai ruk…jum dai tur mai jum pen dtaung yum eek tee
You don’t love me, I remember, you don’t have to repeat it again
อย่าให้ฉันดูไร้ค่ากว่านี้
Yah hai chun doo rai kah gwah nee
Don’t make me feel like I’m any more worthless
ฉันรู้ดีเธอไม่รักกัน
Chun roo dee tur mai ruk gun
I know quite well you don’t love me

ฉันก็รู้ว่าเธอคงต้องลำบาก
Chun gor roo wah tur kong dtaung lum bahk
I know you’re probably annoyed
เธอคงไม่อยากให้เขาคิดมากไป
Tur kong mai yahk hai kao kit mahk pai
You probably don’t want her to think too much about it
จะกวนเธอแค่อีกคำที่ค้างใจ
Ja guan tur kae eek kum tee kahng jai
I’ll bother you with just one more word left in my heart
ก่อนจะวางไปอยากจะบอกรักเธอเหลือเกิน
Gaun ja wahng pai yahk ja bauk ruk tur leua gern
Before I let it go, I want to tell you that I love you so much

EX RHINO - Social Night

It's 4.28 pm now.

Guess what.

I JUST WOKE UP.

It's the latest that I've ever woken up in my whole 19 years of life.

LOL.

Felt quite shiok but damn guilty.

Like that half my saturday gone already.

...

Anyway had ex rhino on wed thurs.

Didn't sleep for 40+ hours.

Cause the thing ended damn late and we had to wake up like 1 hour after lights out timing.

Then went home on friday.

Dota.

Then boom it was social night.

Didn't even had time to sleep.

Went to NUS to fetch Ling Fang.

Hahahaha.

Then went to SAFTI's officer mess for social night.

Hahaha.

It was one of the most awkward night ever.

But at least it was fun.

Hahhaha.

The thing is that all the guys there haven't sleep properly for 30+ hours already.

So for me the whole night felt kinda like a dream.

Even I wake up now I still feel weird.

Hahaha.

Yeah so took a lot of photos, eat dinner, watch performance and then headed to Upper Thomson Road with Ling Fang to meet with ODAC.

Xin Ying, Hui Si and Yvette were there already.

Chin Yue and Ying Ting came afterwards.

So we kept moving around Upper Thomson Road.

From some dimsum place to rochor tao huey to wafflelicious to 7-11 and we still wanted to go holland v.

But in the end just decided to go eat bar chor mee hahahaha.

Was so damn tired I swear.

Shall go enjoy half of my saturday today :D

NEKO JUMP~

So hot~
Hahaha.
Anw, enjoying this Sunday hahaha.
Was doing AOP and shit.
Then dota the whole day.
Really never do much today.
Quite wasted.
Hahaha but yesterday was nice.
After comms parade, went to look for Chin Yue and Deon.
But sadly Deon left already.
And Nicole, Leon and Wei Lun.
But Nicole left before Wei Lun came.
So me Leon Wei Lun and Chin Yue went to wine connection to drink and ear some pizza.
Hahahaha.
Damn funny.
We drank a lot of wine and we got semi drunk.
Then there were like two girls dancing at some other open bar.
They were dancing to some music video.
Or some game I don't know.
But we kept staring at them.
Then the way they dance was like damn into it.
There was one music which was quite siao.
So I was getting high when watching them dance.
LOL then suddenly one of the girl started waving towards our table.
So I waved back first then the rest all waved back.
Then the girl was like asking us to go there.
LOL.
It was really damn epic.
Then we just stayed at our table of course.
When she signaled for us to go there all of us like became sober immediately.
LOL.
Yeah so we stayed there but she kept giving us the hand signal to go over.
BUT WE STAYED.
Cause I don't think she's really pretty.
Then later she took out her specs just to LOOK at our faces.
Then I was like WTF WTF.
Damn freaking epic.
HAhahaha.
Great night last night~

90/13 COMMISSION LO

Congrats to my seniors who have just graduated. Congrats Zhi Wen and Lee Yang :D Road usher today. Stood there for freaking 3 hours. Couldn't even see the parade. No ang pao. Nevertheless, seeing so many newly commissioned officer makes me feel happy. Gives me motivation to continue with my course in OCS. It's damn sian but seeing them in their number 1 and smiling so happily makes me long for april. It's gonna be long, but it's not that long. Just 6 more months. Tank it and it will be through. The most memorable thing today was actually the parents. The parents all walked to SAFTI parade square feeling so proud. Like "Wah, my son is going to be an officer in hours time." Then all the parents so excited about the parade and stuff. I really hope that I don't OOC by then. Then I'll make my parents proud while standing in the parade square. AHHHH. So long so long. We'll pull it through ECHO!

Respect and Humility

Just played basketball in camp. Now blogging while in my bunk. That short basketball match made me think a lot. I know it's just a game but I've some things to talk about it. Was playing with the usual Platoon 1 people. And one of them was always more rough. I didn't think so in the past until he knocked me down the other time. I'm not a basketball player so I thought, "Maybe it's just how real basketball players play" So I was trying to view him as someone that is not that rough. But that basketball match proved otherwise. I was disappointed with myself for not scoring and stuffs. Then my ball keep getting snatch. Then one of the guy keep saying "This guy most easy to snatch one" Then one incident I was trying to pass to Dexter but I did a stupid pass straight to the same guy. Then he was like "Wtf? He pass to me ah? He pass to me ah? I thought he check sia." WAH KNN PCB FUCK YOU AND YOUR DOG FACE. Fucking guai lan. I pass wrong then pass wrong already. Just take the ball and stfu. Need so much comment anot lj dog. I swear I was fucking dulan. I tried to keep as calm as possible already. Then he started saying "Wah, why they all so serious one?" They were obviously thrashing us la. But come on, instead of rubbing in can you all stop being so cocky. Maintain some pride for us and for yourself. Then I was so pissed off that I accidentally elbow the guy trying to block me. So I apologised very sincerely. I was really very sincere about the apology. I asked whether he was okay. And he went "Eh play basketball can chill anot?" And to be honest, I didn't even feel myself hitting him. He just suddenly "OHH AWOH WOH" Smlj. In the midst of everything, in the anger and pissed situation. My BMTC sir, 2LT Lester came to my mind. If I were to carry on being so pissed off what will it do good to myself and to the game. So I thought about the two words he told 5th Coy Platoon 4. Respect and Humility will bring you far. And I toned down. And all of a sudden, I feel so much different in that situation. I started being less pissed and started respecting every single one of them. Even the lj dog face guy. So I guessed I learn a lesson from that basketball match. Never been so pissed for a long time already. Pissed at myself actually.

Hahaha scorpion king is over

This means that service term is about to end.
And this also means that social night is coming.
And they have to freaking change the date.
WHY??
It's so difficult for me to ask a girl to come for my social night.
Yet when I finally succeeded they have to change to a date that she can't make it.
How can?
Stress stress.
Imagine I have to start paying to ask people to go.
Hahahaha.
7 extras leh.
Not fake one.
Ahh stress stress.

Anyway.
Scorpion king was so rough shit.
Only managed to catch like 4 hours of sleep for 4D3N.
The moment I touch the bed.
I don't even need to count 10 seconds I'm already in my dream world already hahaha.
It's one of the toughest shit I've been through.
Really damn damn shag.
When I came back to civi.
Feels so damn weird.
Like everyone just walking by.
And don't know the shit I've just been through.
That kind of feeling.
Anyway I'm damn tired now so I might blog shit.
Haha.

So what else.
Oh went to Leon's house yesterday to COOK.
It was successful legit dinner.
We had pizza cereal prawns.
Chicken / chicken sausage meat pizza.
Seafood pizza.
Some potato salad thing.
And it's damn nice.
Don't know whether we're hungry or what but it was really not that bad.
The pizza tasted like pizza.
(Note: We started from scratch. Flour, water, yeast and shit)
So the dough was a little fucked up.
HAHAHA but it was nice la.
Taste of cinnamon.
WHAT?
So after eating, played GTA 5.
Skyfall on mountains and saying shit like "This is my dream"
And start running on mountain ridge lines and shit.
Damn funny hahaha.
So after screwing around with the GTA 5, headed to Nex by cab to meet up with Vincent, Kenny, Ivan, Wei Sheng and Zong Han.
Watched insidious part 2 which is quite scary.
It's inbetween conjuring and insidious part 1 if I must say.
So after the movie, ton at zh's house.
They play mahjong while I play dota.
Damn damn damn tired now.
Hahaha.
Yup so I haven't sleep since yesterday 12pm?
More than 24 hours already.
Should I go sleep or should I tank it until in camp then I sleep.
Hmm.
Shall tank it.
Lolol.
DOTA TIME.