Self-care

What a timely reminder by my sub-conscious to take care of myself.
So much shit has happened just today.
It's so freaking crazy and I didn't know how I managed to survive today.
Several panic attacks while I travelled from one meetings to another.
But I'm really thankful to people who understood me.
In the sense that though they were related to me in terms of my event, they were more concerned about my well-being first.
Like how Runi asked me how I was feeling before she started talking things to me.
Almost teared in front of her lol.
And also like Hazlee who just smoked and talk to me outside the store about how to go about doing things from now on.
And Fel, who were just reassuring me that it's not my fault and that I'm just a student etc.

However, that won't stop me thinking that I fucked certain things up.
But I think if I just kept going and focusing about how I fucked it up so badly, things would just get worse.
Nothing will move on.
I know things are going to get more stress from now on, and I think self-care is so important for me.
The last person that should criticise of my capabilities should be myself.

What a crazy day.
Will definitely remember this day.

I can't continue

With anything at all.

If I let this setback pull me down.

I'm sure I don't want to see what I've built up over the past 9 months to crumble just because of this.

I need to pick myself up.

There's so many people to answer to yes, but I would do it.

Like what Wen Shu said, I just have to try my best.

Sometimes I think whether trying my best is enough.

But I think I need to remind myself that it is enough.

And what I'm doing is sufficient.

I know that I am doing too much.

And I know that I'm not able to handle so many things at one go.

But step by step, one by one.

I'm sure things will get better.

Have confidence in myself.

Not the time to self-blame.

Let's do this.

Darkness seeps through

Like black magma.

Slowly deforming my reality.

I can't think anymore.

It's a burnt brain.

Want this to end so badly.

Stress

I'm drowning with the number of things I've got to do.
BA exco rally and studies.
I dread this week so bad.
Especially today.
Can't wait for today to end.