I feel like nothing is going to work out if my mental state stays like this.
Like friends, families, career etc etc.
I guess that explains why I don't really want to meet new people too cause I can't even get past my own head.
Let alone have another person come into my life.
But dreamt of M yesterday for the first time.
Lol, and went back to check what's the last thing I didn't reply.
So much feels because it was kinda my decision to leave it hanging like that.
And now I'm regretting my decisions.
And that's how life these few days have been.
Just regretting and forget.
And let everything - pain / happiness / emotions in general to just flow in this infinite river,
That brings so much blur and out of the world kind of depersonalisation.
It's as if I only have a few hours of sober each day.
Damn.
