It's been quite some time

Since I study past midnight.
Guess whenever I stay in school I always end up studying past midnight hahahaha.
Kind of nice to start feeling stress.
At least you know you still have some concern about education.
Quite shag though.
Tomorrow got two papers, (suddenly realised got two lol).
Then need to do my thai oral with Zanelle also.
That bugger (who sometimes read my blog) has FYP so I guessed we have to ask for extension.
School's kinda busyyyyyy.
Wew.

Wondering

You know sometimes I just wonder, what defines who we really are?
They say we are defined by our thoughts.
But you know sometimes thoughts can just be so different at different times of the day.
At times I feel like there's just so many thoughts and it's really crazy to see how the thoughts link and whirl around endlessly but yet we're just only able to catch glimpse of these thoughts.
It's like you don't know what you're really thinking about.
And then when it grows too heavily, they are all released by tears.
Then when the tears come out, you feel this sudden sense of calm and emptiness.
And you think to yourself, why did I think so much just now.
And it's like no matter how hard you try to think of what you thought, it just doesn't appear again.
That's when you ask yourself, so which then is the real you?
The one that don't think as much or the other?
I just don't know how to answer this question.
I guess it's kind of both.
Like what you said, if we don't have the balance of both, we might go crazy.

Was reading my book on the train ride to school this morning.
And it's interesting to think why humans are chasing happiness.
Since I've always said that it's our thoughts, memories and emotions that defines us, then why is it that we need to chase happiness if being sad or depressed is a form of emotion too.
Maybe humans are just scared of the latter.
Being sad is being us too.

Tripping like I'm not supposed to

I guess thoughts explode through the eyes

Too much words

I should stop reading words.
I think I read too much words today.
It's kind of tiring.
I'm going to sleep.
Good night world.

Poof

Mock Comp @ TP

Wew, mock comp was just terrible.
But it's okay because I knew what went wrong.
Not focused, not hydrated and totally not warmed up.
Hahahahaha..
Lucky I got one bonus, if not I think I'll feel quite bad.
But nevertheless it was okayyyyyyy.
Not like I trained hard for it or anything hahahaha.
RM next week, not sure how I'd be.
Hmmm.

Alcohol

Same chemicals, different effects. One a stronger reality, one a stronger pretence. Yet  the struggle is between letting her pretend, or to get my unspoken words out.